Women and Promiscuity: The Parallel

tumblr_mlq6eithPp1s95wzmo1_1280So, when men say they want a “lady in the street, but a freak in the bed”, what does that really mean? I don’t believe men want a freak for real. I think what they’re really saying is, “I want a lady in the street, and when I get home I want her to do whatever I want in the bed”.  After all, the freaky behavior is mostly to his benefit. Isn’t that rather selfish, to create such a saying; compiling my entire role as a sexual being into a simple aphorism.

Although society grows more modern, many men maintain antiquated views of women. Even when a man says, “I wanna make sure you get yours first”. What does that mean? Is this in effort to get my orgasm done and out-of-the-way so you can focus more on your own, the pièce de résistance? From what I hear most “freaks” are single women. Once married freakish behavior tends to decline into an abyss never to be seen again.

slut shaming 1There’s this fine line between the freak he wants and the freak he would never marry. An unmarried adult man in his thirty’s told me he could never see himself ejaculating on his wife’s face. Yet, he would on the face of a girl he’s just “dating”, really a girl he’s just fucking. In his mind, he has already reserved types of sexual behavior specific to a type of woman and her role in his life. Is this common? So what, if you meet the woman of your dreams, only to later find out she’s had several sexual partners in her past? Does this make her any less the woman of your dreams?

I found it interesting when I googled the word “promiscuous”, most of the images displayed were of women.

tumblr_m1kry7C95Y1qe7dlao4_1280My theory: Some men attribute freakish behavior with promiscuity. Assuming a woman that’s a “freak” has had many partners. A wife may do freaky things, but a man does not want to see his wife as a freak because he may began to assume she is promiscuous and more likely to commit adultery.  A publicly known freak is less likely to be a contender as a wife, because she may bring shame to a man’s image. Shame and embarrassment exhibits lack of control, one of the main components of maintaining manhood is the ability to control (lead) his environment. Is there truth to my theory?

-Noni Ayana





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